“You are not your job. You don’t need to do it out of love or because it’s central to your character anymore than you’d expect any other laborer to, no matter what they do. Love your life, work your job.“
Artist Zac Gorman of Super Time Force and Magical Game Time talks at length about doing what you can & be happy regardless when it comes to work and your identity.
I turned 33 today, which as far as birthdays go isn’t the most remarkable. It’s not the milestone of 21 or the “You’re old. Yuk yuk.” filled celebration of 40. It’s just kind of a date in the middle.
The denotation of the Earth traversing the Sun is an apt time to reflect on past events. I enjoy using apps such as Timehop and digging back through blog posts and Flickr uploads to keep myself grounded in time. It’s easy to get swept up in daily life and skew your memory of how long ago (or how recent) things have happened.
That said – Man, this year has been crazy so far.
In March I helped to organize and presented at WordCamp St. Louis. We’re already starting to talk about next year!
My wife, daughter, and I traveled to Indianapolis at the end of March and had a great week in the city. I was able to spend a lot of time with Kari and we bonded a bit.
In April my wife’s rescue hosted our first Car Show fundraiser. It was a fun experience and I’m glad we tried something new to garner interest in the cause.
Just this past month I traveled to Montreal for work. It was my first time out of the country and I had a great time. I was able to see some of the city, take in some of the culture and food, and present at my first international conference. 🙂
We still have two vacations planned (!) for this year, the first is a trip at the end of June to Florida. My daughter is competing at a big dance conference in Panama City and we’ve turned it into a family vacation with my sister and her brood. Oh, speaking of my sister, Jess got married to Donnie, which is something of an event in itself.
The other trip is in late July. My dad, Kari, myself, and maybe Jackie will be taking a road trip to Rapid City, SD to visit Mount Rushmore. The trip itself is the vacation and echoes a trip my dad and I took right before I got my first car. This trip is also a milestone of sorts for Kari as it will be the last family vacation before she’s a big sister. That’s right. We’re expecting our second child in September. That’s kind of the Pièce de résistance for this year.
I don’t feel 33, but I feel 33. I still like to play Lego with Kari (and sometimes when she’s not around, but don’t tell her that!). I still enjoy video games – although I’m much more interested in portable gaming than sitting in front of the TV which is a bit of a change. I still like many things from years past, but I also like things I didn’t when I was younger.
I enjoy taking care of my lawn. Yeah, that feeling when you step back after spending a few hours mowing, trimming, seeding, etc. As Delmar O’Donnel said in O Brother, Where Art Thou?, “You ain’t no kind of man if you ain’t got land.” There’s something to that pride when you’re a homeowner.
I also like mustard on my deli sandwiches and have a better tolerance for alcohol. I’m not a beer drinker, but I’m a huge rum and coke/hard cider guy. The younger Chris never cared much for anything with alcohol, but I’m growing into a comfortable space and can have a drink or two.
I’m writing this all down for myself. It gives me a chance to stick a push-pin in time. A future self can hopefully look back on this year as a happy reminder of things going well.
“In research for her book, Steiner-Adair interviewed 1,000 children between the ages of 4 and 18, asking them about their parents’ use of mobile devices. The language that came up over and over and over again, she says, was “sad, mad, angry and lonely.” … There was one girl who said, “I feel like I’m just boring. I’m boring my dad because he will take any text, any call, anytime — even on the ski lift!”“
http://www.npr.org/blogs/health/2014/04/21/304196338/for-the-childrens-sake-put-down-that-smartphone
I’ve been bad about this, but with Kari and the second on the way I’m getting much better about putting the phone away around family.
NPR has been running many stories about parents, distraction, and technology this week. Here’s another good one.
I’ve been trying to figure out what success is, what it means to be successful and why people around me are either outwardly successful or self-deprecating in their success.
I should note, personally I’ve struggled with the idea of success. I grew up in a trailer park with parents that, while loving and caring and tentative to my needs, were not educated in a higher degree or what society might consider traditionally successful. Financials were (and continue to be) an issue for a large part of my family.
Myself? Well I’m doing OK. I went to college and met someone who makes me want more for myself. I found something I’m passionate about (the crossroads of people and technology) and am well-respected in my field.
From that angle, I could say I’m successful. Compared to others? Well, that’s a funny thing. I always feel like a dullard or slacker.
But success is measured in so many ways – far beyond the padding in your wallet or the comforts of your home.
As Joss Whedon put so eloquently in his commencement speech to his Alma Mater,
“I talk about this contradiction and this tension… There’s two things I want to say about it. One, it never goes away. And if you think that achieving something, if you think that solving something, if you think a career or a relationship will quiet that voice? It will not.
If you think happiness means total peace, you will never be happy. Peace comes from the acceptance of the part of you that can never be at peace. They will always be in conflict and if you accept that, everything gets a lot better!”
That voice inside me that Joss speaks about is definitely not quiet. Every day I struggle to understand what success and happiness are and to constantly pursue things that bring me both. I wish for both success and happiness to all whom I meet. I try to mentor and advise those close to me – not to be a know-it-all or a wise-ass – to help in some small way to bring friends and family up.
Another intelligent and experienced person once said,
“The only time you should look in your neighbor’s bowl is to make sure that they have enough. You don’t look in your neighbor’s bowl to see if you have as much as them.”
That’s Louis C.K. It’s from his TV show in which he plays a fictionalized version of himself. He’s speaking to his daughter in the scene. It applies to anyone, regardless of age.
So what is success? I have come to think that it’s totally subjective and any canned or preconceived notions we have as young people should be thrown out the window. An individual could be the poorest schmuck on Earth, but in his story he’s happy and therefore the most successful bum that ever lived.
A person with a highfalutin title might be unhappy and unsatisfied with their career or do something they’re not passionate about.
Don’t judge people by their title or position. I’ve met some really smart managers and some really inane leaders. I’ve met first-response service folks who are aces.
That said, I do think there are things you can do to be more successful and happy. It’s not just luck or environment. It’s awareness and a desire to do better – to move toward success and happiness.
These things have worked for me, are subjective, and should be taken with a grain of salt.
—-
Be an Adult
Tuck your shirt in. Wear nice shoes. Learn about collar stays. Always wear a belt.
Not just dressing, act like one. Meet people in person instead of the phone or email for the first time if you can. Never yell, cuss or say something that is otherwise rude. Don’t say anything bad about your co-workers, boss, clients, or mailman in public spaces – especially the Internet.
Show Empathy
Everyone is the protagonist in their own story. Understand where they’re coming from and listen to what they have to say.
Don’t Abuse Meetings
Show up on time, be prepared and know how to set up the damn projector.
Put your devices down. Turn off the laptop. The email is not more important than this meeting (see below).
Stand up when someone enters the room and introduce yourself.
See Also:
http://www.lukew.com/ff/entry.asp?1741
Really Listen
When someone is talking listen. listening is not waiting for your turn to talk.
This is a huge help for appropriately understanding the work that is being asked of you. If you don’t listen, are impatient, and want to quickly jump to the end where you get out of the room so you can go build something you will be frustrated when the client asks, “What is this? I didn’t ask for this.”
See Also:
View at Medium.com
Turn of the @!*# Email
Email is not real-time. You don’t need to check it every five minutes. Turn it off on the evenings and weekends. Replying to emails at 3 in the morning is not a badge of honor. No one is going to pat your back for it.
Work to Live
Know what you should get paid. Talk about salaries with close friends. Understand what you’re getting into with a new company or position. Work a little more than what you’re paid. Show initiative. Offer to help others and when others ask, help where you can.
I’ve never worked more than 40 hours constantly at any job I’ve ever had. Am I lucky? Nope. I work hard, know my stuff, am constantly learning, and act like an adult.
—-
When I was in college I was at a party with some folks older than me, but in the same field I was hoping to soon join. Being young and stupid about how things work, I asked what sort of advice could they give me about the field. In my nascent mind I was expecting tips about using Photoshop better or best practices around workflow or industry trends.
Instead the best advice they gave me was don’t put in 60 hours to impress your boss. It’s not worth it professionally and defiantly not worth it personally.
I think that dovetails with success and happiness. It’s not just what you do for a living. It’s the things that you do with your time on this planet. It’s the stuff during your 9-5, the evenings at home, and the weekends with friends. It’s never just one of those things, it’s all of them in moderation and consistent drive to push them all forward. Work hard, meet new people, travel, and enjoy what you have.
A few weeks ago we traveled to Boston to attend PAX (Penny Arcade Expo) East. It was awesome and I’m still reeling from all the amazing things we saw. Kari had a great time, got tons of swag, and even won some pretty cool prizes.
While there I kept a running list of some of the games that I’m most looking forward to. In no particular order here are a few worth checking out when they release in the near future.
Zombie Tycoon II (PS3 and Vita)
This is by the very talented Frima Studios, makers of the throwback bullet hell shooter “A Space Shooter for Two Bucks” that came out on the PSP a few years back. As always, the production quality is top-notch with unique designs and animation. This is a RTS where you control a horde of zombies, a mobile base and a special monster as you try to not only take over a town, but keep the opposing zombies at bay. Kari and I played a round with her on the PS3 and I on a Vita. She liked it a lot. (We also won a PS Vita in a drawing, but that only sweetened the deal.)
Mercenary Kings (PC)
Paul Robertson (NSFW) is an insanely talented artist, known primarily for his over the top pixel art. He did the sprite work for the recent Scott Pilgrim game. It’s a 2D 4 player Metal Slug-esque shoot-em-up.
A.N.N.E. (PC)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dC6Re76NriA
Reminds me of Cave Story with some heavy and deliberate Super Metroid influences. The guys manning the booth were super cool and the playable version at PAX was promising. (are you noticing a trend of awesome retro gaming?)
Tearaway (PS VIta)
Media Molecule, the genius behind Little Big Planet have a new game coming out this October that revolves around a little messenger in a land made of paper. You have to help guide him along his journey using all sorts of input methods. Not only an amazing looking game, but their booth was top-notch as well. The booth is made of paper for a game about a world made of paper where you can print out objects in the game with paper – infinity.
Super T.I.M.E Force (PC)
Yeah, nuff said.
Mighty Switch Force 2 (3DS)
I really enjoyed the first one on the 3DS. Here’s to hoping this one is bigger and badder than the first. You play as Patricia Wagon, who in this go round is now trying to save the reformed criminals from the first game with her unique powers. Wayforward, the makers of this game, are also in charge of the remaster of the SNES classic Ducktales!
Monsters Invade (iOS)
This is on the list mainly for the crazy inflatable they were handing out. LOLWUT?
http://instagram.com/p/XLRU9Wo-Sm/
This list doesn’t include tons of big triple-A titles like Hawken, Luigi’s Mansion – Dark Moon and The Last of Us. These should be at the top of everyone’s list already.
I should also mention a few games that were on display that I’ve already play and recommend as well.
Major Magnet (for iPhone)
Beautiful animation, spot-on chiptune soundtrack and the level designs take me back to Sonic and the 16 bit Sega Genesis. The devs are two young guys who were nice to talk to and I wish them all the best.
Ridiculous Fishing (also for iOS)
Imagine an arcade-y fishing simulator where you have to see how deep you can cast your line. Then imagine that you have to catch as many fish on the way back up. Then, on top of that, imagine that as you reel the fish from the water you have to shoot them as fast as you can. Oh, and all the imagery is in weird 45 degree parallelogram shapes. Did I mention that your lure has a chainsaw attached to it? It’s, well, ridiculous.
Oh, and anything by Double Fine, including the release of Brutal Legend for PC!